At Your Own Pace

The reigning mentality in our generation is that everyone must strive to be their “own boss”. Everyone seems to be chasing the bag, whatever that looks like, and making it happen for themselves. That‘s all great and dandy. But for some of us, it’s not so easy. And if you’re like me, it may seem overwhelming.

It‘s as if there’s a checklist ahead of us to graduate at a certain time, be married at a specific age, or own a house in a particular neighborhood. The list goes on. But, what happens if you seem to be behind? I know that feeling of insecurity and failure because I feel like I’m not where I should be in life because of where others are. Let me tell you. It sucks.

My expected graduation date was set for Spring 2020. But, because of mess ups and bad choices I had to graduate a semester later than most of my friends. In that last semester, I had to push myself more than I ever had because I couldn’t risk failing again. The shame of it all! The entire ordeal left me feeling inferior to my peers and disappointed in myself for not being where I was supposed to be. I spent nights crying because I was worried that I pushed my life goals back ten years. But, eventually I had to talk to myself. “It’s only one semester, Bianca.”

”You’re only 23, Bianca. You have time.”

I know many people who feel that same way because they never finished school or their business isn’t flourishing the way they’d like. But, it’s not a race. And it is most certainly not a competition. No one posts their failures.

I know anxiety comes in stealthily when we compare our lives to others but remember that comparison is the thief of joy. It will rob you until you have nothing left. There’s no one way to experience life. We all have a path to take and the things we see along that journey will be different for each of us. Don’t be discouraged if life isn’t going the same way for you as it is for the next person. That’s their story. Your story is a breathtaking tale that is yours and yours alone.